A Flabulous Girls Guide to Underwear

So this weekend has ended with me tidying my bedroom. A tedious task I don’t do anywhere near as often as I ought. I get bored or distracted. Distracted and bored. But this weekend I managed it. I took chaos, moved chaos and put chaos into other places. Some of it survived and some of it ended up in the bin.

But I need your help. Underwear. I sorted out my underwear drawer. And I am left wondering what the hell I was thinking when I bought some of it.

So my sock collection is relatively normal. Some black plain ones, some striped ones and some novelty ones. A quick sort through, got rid of ones with holes, ones I don’t wear and then the socks were done.

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Next came the pants. Broadly 3 categories again. Sexy pants, not so sexy but comfy pants and then the broadly horrific stomach holding in pants. The ones even Bridget Jones would not dare admitting to owning.

As a self confessed flabulous woman I am wondering, what kind of self respecting flabulous woman would wear these things?! It’s not as if by wearing them I suddenly become thin, or that they are particularly comfortable, they just hold my belly in and make me feel like a bit of a fool.

So dear reader do I keep these pants? Those horrendous torture devices which change the shape of my body to please, well who to please exactly? Love me, love my curves. I’m thinking I should ditch them…

Next came the bras. Now recently I went and got my boobs measured for the first time in ages. I am a 40GG. So there has been a bit of a turn around in this section of my underwear drawer. So the unsupportive Greying cotton ones are now in the bin as are the ones where the underwire has popped out but I kept because they were pretty. I then came across two MINIMISER BRAS. They make your boobs look *smaller*. Now being quite “well endowed” in the booobage department I wondered why on earth I had bought them. They are a nice pair of boobs so I hear, so why the hell would I want to shrink them?! I am frankly disgusted with myself for owning them.

No underwear in the world is going to make me look thin. I might as well face facts. Especially when I do this….

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So I think I’m just going to say to myself, if it makes you feel sexy, buy it and wear it. But don’t feel you have to wear torturous undergarments that push and pull you in all directions. What self respecting flabulous woman would do that to herself!?

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